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I don't know what to call it by ~kore-karasu:iconkore-karasu:



A song comes on. It’s ours; mine; no one’s. It reminds me of something, something that makes me long for someone; someone in particular, no one in particular, anyone, no one. I miss a feeling, a feeling given by people, a person, one at a time and never all the way. I want them all back, and none of them back. I want him back, but know I can’t have him. Sometimes he doesn’t feel right for what I want, not as this. I want a feeling, a touch, a person. I want a role to be filled, but filled right – not just some stand-in like last time, like all the times before.

Another song comes on. It’s no different. The same need, the same want, the same cold feeling on my back and under my arms and around my solar plexus. Different song, same longing.

Piano. Always piano.
©2007-2009 ~kore-karasu
:iconkore-karasu:

Author's Comments

I just wrote this, and I'd really like some sort of affirmation that someone's read it. It's poetic prose, I guess. Whatever. I just want you to let me know you read it.

Comments


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:iconjaynatonge:
I read it!


Interesting. I would like to see you develop this a little more when you have time :)

--


:heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart::heart:
:iconkore-karasu:
Thank you. <3

Maybe I will. I kind of barely remember it now, 'cause I was sleep depping when I wrote/posted it, and so...yeah. But we'll see.

--
mrow~ <3

sbp = <3
:iconjensquared:
The piano bit is slightly odd. o o

I like the idea. I like all the pauses you put in. Commas don't seem right for them, though. Commas don't seem... dramatic enough. Something like that?

Anywho, I half concur with Jayna. Part of me thinks it would be awesome if you developed it some more; the other part of me thinks you shouldn't touch it because it's beautiful the way it is.

... I read it! :3 <3

--
Believe in the light, and let the dark clouds float on by.
:iconkore-karasu:
The piano bit is referring to the songs always having piano in them, or being just piano. To Zanarkand, I think, is the song that prompted this piece.

Mmm....I feel like the commas are there because they're grammatically correct; I don't like to overuse the semicolon. Still, I know what you mean. I might go back through and change them.

Mm, well, I dunno how I could continue it...I don't see anywhere to expand on: it's complete in my mind. So I think I'm going to let it be, but thanks for the compliment. :3

Yay! Thanks for reading it and letting me know. <3

--
mrow~ <3

sbp = <3
:iconjensquared:
I figured it was referring to the songs, but it seems... detached from the rest of the piece.

I'm sort of breaking grammatically correct writing if it sounds better to me, but that's just me. You could use periods?

I think it seems complete. It's one of those pieces you COULD but don't necessary have to expand on. It's awesome. :3

You are welcome. <3

--
Believe in the light, and let the dark clouds float on by.
:iconkore-karasu:
It was kind of an afterthought that i just randomly stuck on there...but i still feel like it's important. It's true, at least.

Yeah, well, normally i break grammatical correctness whenever i feel like it, but for some reason i didn't do that with these commas. i think i just love commas too much. i could always just use the ever-infamous double dash "--" or a [semi.]colon or what have you. i dunno, i just used commas. hm.

Really? i just...i dunno. i had a thought, i wrote it down. i don't see where i could expand. But i guess that's the curse of being too close to your work, or whatever.

:3 <3

--
mrow~ <3

sbp = <3
:iconjensquared:
That's good to know -- that you break grammatical correctness whenever you feel like it. :] <3

--
Believe in the light, and let the dark clouds float on by.
:iconkore-karasu:
Well, if it's not writing for school, i don't see the need to adhere to grammatical correctness 100% of the time. So long as people can understand what i write, it doesn't matter as much. Leastaways that's how i see it.

--
mrow~ <3

sbp = <3
:iconjensquared:
I concur. :] <3

--
Believe in the light, and let the dark clouds float on by.

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December 10, 2007
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